Vai chegar o dia em que eu não escreverei mais sobre ti, mas amanhã não é ainda a véspera desse dia. Pedro Mexia (a-leiseca)
[Ouvi-o tocar, vi o teu nome e afastei-me. Não quero ouvir a tua voz, quero manter-te morto... mas desde esse momento que tenho um nó na garganta e o coração a bater descompassado. Anseio pela véspera de tal dia.]
- "quando eu penso no que quero para o futuro tu não estás incluída";
- "o caminho que decidi percorrer é o do bem estar";
- "a minha vontade não é estar contigo";
- "não é terapêutico nem para mim nem para ti";
- "a verdade acima de tudo".
Like a far flung star There you are Littlest than before As you slip from my fingertips Left me here on the burning shore Searched and searched Ah, you were worth so much More than you ever thought you were Everything you believe I still carry with me Broken down on the burning shore And it must have felt much easier To have the stars along your side And it must have felt much easier To have the world along your side A Daddy's girl I see you curl And sleeping on the floor Maybe you dream a little dream of me Down here on the burning shore Yeah, there you are Attached to a star Beyond the point of no return Maybe you ought to spare a thought For those of us down here who never learn And it must have felt much easier To have the world along your side And it must have felt much easier To have the stars along your side
Out of sorrow entire worlds have been built Out of longing great wonders have been willed They're only little tears, darling, let them spill And lay your head upon my shoulder Outside my window the world has gone to war
As últimas palavras foram secas, assépticas. Transportam o peso da desistência e da desilusão - não sei sequer se repararás na falta de calor, de humanidade. Foram escritas por quem não tolera nem mais um golpe numa pele cheia de cortes profundos e intermináveis.
What you've managed is to cheapen everything I've done and don't pretend to know what I've been through, son. And these days grievances come through my open door, (...) I was once a careless lover, now I live most undercover. Keaton Henson [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wvD4bAqj5qc]
Does he know when you're sad? You don't like to be touched, Let alone kissed. Does he know where your lips begin? Do you know who you are? Do you laugh, just to know what I lack? Do you know your lip shakes when you're mad? And do you notice when you're sad? You don't like to be touched, Let alone kissed. Does his love make your head spin?
“os eucaliptos dos anos destroem tudo em torno de nós. Sobram cinzas, raízes, sombras, restos de pedras calcinadas, vozes ao rés da erva à procura da boca onde nasceram, a pedir que as escutemos. O que se ganha em troca? Uma cor diferente no silêncio, aquilo a que chamamos sabedoria e não é mais que uma tristeza resignada”
Não passo sequer no quarteirão do cemitério. Ainda não descobri como se faz o luto de um vivo. Só lhe consegui esquecer a voz... mas não o cheiro, a pele, as palavras e, sobretudo, o calor do abraço. Temo encontrá-lo a cada esquina e... perceber que não morreu ainda.
I asked my father, I said, "Father change my name." The one I'm using now it's covered up with fear and filth and cowardice and shame. (...) He said, "I locked you in this body, I meant it as a kind of trial." (...) "Then let me start again," I cried, "please let me start again, I want a face that's fair this time, I want a spirit that is calm." Leonard Cohen
I stepped into an avalanche, it covered up my soul; when I am not this hunchback that you see, I sleep beneath the golden hill. You who wish to conquer pain, you must learn, learn to serve me well. You strike my side by accident as you go down for your gold. The cripple here that you clothe and feed is neither starved nor cold; he does not ask for your company, not at the centre, the centre of the world. When I am on a pedestal, you did not raise me there. Your laws do not compel me to kneel grotesque and bare. I myself am the pedestal for this ugly hump at which you stare. You who wish to conquer pain, you must learn what makes me kind; the crumbs of love that you offer me, they're the crumbs I've left behind. Your pain is no credential here, it's just the shadow, of my wound. I have begun to long for you, I who have no greed; I have begun to ask for you, I who have no need. You say you've gone away from me, but I can feel you when you breathe. Do not dress in those rags for me, I know you are not poor; you don't love me quite so fiercely now when you know that you are not sure, it is your world, beloved, it is your flesh that I wear.
"I have so many bruises, I have so many scars, but you have such a smile. Oh you have such a smile.
I can't believe I was counting the days it would take to come back if I leave.
Oh, I can't believe I was blinking and trying to read between the lines.
I can't believe I was swimming in this empty pool.
Oh, I can't believe you're my Big Bang."
Was there a time when love had failed you And left you no place left to turn? And was there a time when love had cradled you And would catch you from any fall? It's not so serious, not so serious Not so serious, after all And was there a wolf that escaped from your dream And hid behind your bedroom door? And was there a hand that reached out and pulled you near And would catch you from any fall? It's not so serious, not so serious Not so serious, after all Mother dear The sky is falling Through this night I am crawling around I need the sound of your heart. Tindersticks
While you were searching for your Gods I was walking through the dark Trying to find a way To make you stay With me But I'm no match for your Gods They have something I have not The promise of a perfect love (...) While you were searching for your Gods I turned my back on us Trying to leave you be So you could find your way Back to me Azure Ray
“The Love Song must be borne into the realm of the irrational, the absurd, the distracted, the melancholic, the obsessive and the insane, for the Love Song is the noise of love itself and love is, of course, a form of madness. Whether it be the love of God, or romantic, erotic love – these are manifestations of our need to be torn away from the rational, to take leave of our senses, so to speak. Love Songs come in many forms and are written for a host of reasons, as declarations of love or revenge, to praise or to wound or to flatter – I have written songs for all of these reasons – but ultimately the Love Song exists to fill, with language, the silence between ourselves and God, to decrease the distance between the temporal and the divine.”
"Jesus said, 'Wherever two or more are gathered together, I am in their midst.' Jesus said this because wherever two or more are gathered together, there is communion, there is language, there is imagination, there is God. God is a product of a creative imagination, and God is that imagination taken flight.
As a child I believed that to use the imagination was wicked. I saw my imagination as a dark room with a large bolted door that housed all manner of shameful fantasies. I could almost hear my secret thoughts bumping and scratching behind the door, begging in whispers to be let out, to be told. Back then, I had no idea that those dark mutterings were coming from God. (...)"
"Closer, move in closer
Closer now than
Than ever before
I doubt it that you can survive
So far from your trenches and your friends
This is where competition starts and
And all that ends
I sense a lot of tension
Pull out your arsenal
By now we should know the music and the steps
Oh, me, I never asked, I never set you up
A little something for me?
A little something thrown back at me?
This is the floor, these are the rules
These are the moves
This is the room in which we dance
Close the door, say you will dance
Step into this room and dance for me
Step into this room and dance for me
Come on, lady, dance for me
Come on, come on, dance for me"
"But there's one thing you can't lose
And it's that feel
You can pawn your watch and chain
But not that feel
It always comes and finds you
It will always hear you cry
I cross my wooden leg
And I swear on my glass eye
It will never leave you high and dry
Never leave you loose
It's harder to get rid of than tattoos"
"she feels like a stranger has come in the night and stolen her life and left her with this and boughs break on ebony toothaches she is just a flask trapped inside a fall I know you need to find what you thought you left behind in a past life I won't question why the only light that you have you give away I know you need to find what you thought you left behind in a past life I won't question why the only light that you have you give away she feels like a stranger has come in the night and stolen her life and left her with this" Man Man
"Nós não somos o outro. De certa maneira, o outro está nos antípodas daqui. (...) Cada palavra que dizemos aqui é simultânea a uma palavra contrária dita pelo outro lá. A língua do outro é incompreensível. Nem parece uma língua. Até estas palavras, até esta frase incompleta. Lá, neste momento, o outro está a dizer exatamente o contrário disto, com a mesma convicção."
José Luís Peixoto, O contrário de mim está a escrever o contrário destas palavras, Visão nº 1027, 08/11/2012
"Wasted and wounded, it ain't what the moon did I got what I paid for now See ya tomorrow, hey Frank can I borrow a couple of bucks from you, to go Waltzing Matilda, waltzing Matilda, you'll go waltzing Matilda with me I'm an innocent victim of a blinded alley and I'm tired of all these soldiers here no one speaks English, and everything's broken and my Stacys are soaking wet to go waltzing Matilda, waltzing Matilda, you'll go waltzing Matilda with me now the dogs are barking and the taxi cabs parking a lot they can do for me I begged you to stab me you tore my shirt open and I'm down on my knees tonight Old Bushmills I staggered, you buried the dagger in your silhouette window light to go waltzing Matilda, waltzing Matilda, you'll go waltzing Matilda with me now I've lost my St. Christopher now that I've kissed her and the one-armed bandit knows, and the maverick Chinaman, and the cold-blooded signs and the girls down by the strip tease shows go waltzing Matilda, waltzing Matilda, you'll go waltzing Matilda with me no I don't want your sympathy the fugitives say that the streets aren't for dreaming now manslaughter dragnets and the ghosts that sell memories They want a piece of the action anyhow go waltzing Matilda, waltzing Matilda, you'll go waltzing Matilda with me and you can ask any sailor and the keys from the jailer and the old men in wheelchairs know that Matilda's the defendant, she killed about a hundred and she follows wherever you may go waltzing Matilda, waltzing Matilda, you'll go waltzing Matilda with me and it's a battered old suitcase to a hotel someplace and a wound that will never heal no prima donna, the perfume is on an old shirt that is stained with blood and whiskey and goodnight to the street sweepers the night watchman flame keepers and goodnight Matilda, too" Tom Waits
"can't you see that we have come so far already? light shines through the cracks and deepest, darkest, clouds
can't you hear that sound you're making?
oh darling Rosa amputees they all agree that they would like their arms and legs back
oh Rosa can't you feel your heart beating?" The Devastations
"queria soltar-te na forma de poema
mas não encontro palavras que te teçam as asas
que não se amedrontem perante a delicadeza melódica do teu sorriso
que se ergam sob o império dos teus olhos
e não se façam sombra.
mas não tenho mãos para te abraçar, ainda que fabulosamente,
– e todas as palavras são titanicamente indignas.
leio, ávido, eternidades na tua voz,
madrugadas quiméricas e legiões de anjos guardando-te,
florestas de opalas vertendo
sigo os teus passos fingindo não te adorar os gestos
as doçuras discretas
os jardins moleculares dançando-te nos dedos
sei que habitas num éden que não alcanço mas não me sei impedir de te passar à porta."
Lima, o orvalho da tua voz'
p.s. - obrigada pelas palavras, pelas melodias, e por tudo o resto.
It takes awhile To settle down My ship of hopes Wait 'til the past leaks out It takes an ocean not to break It takes an ocean not to break It takes an ocean not to break Matt Berninger [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=330UqSBEXaU]
"Tenho um copo meio cheio de derrota na secretária, junto das folhas soltas onde guardo pensamentos como quem cultiva em solo estéril mas não perde a esperança. Folheio abrasivamente o catálogo de loucuras: procuro um produto económico, mas eficaz; os caules de papoila que não tenho fumado tardam em cimentar o desespero. Quando olho, olho pela janela que não tenho, mas vejo sempre o outro eu rindo-se e perseguindo os fantasmas de lama das enxurradas estivais – parece-me feliz. Pergunto-me se saberá o que é ser a angústia travestida de vertigem e amordaçada observando as auroras sempre tão perfeitas nos olhos dos outros. Entretanto, as páginas vão-me marcando desinteressadamente os dedos. Fecho a janela para a luz não me julgar."
bleib bleib bleib bleib es fehlen stäbe, stäbe fehlen die zwischenräume sind gross genug dein schnelles herz wenn ich dich halte ich hab’ dich unglücklich erwischt bleib bleib bleib bleib ich kann dich nicht am fliegen hindern aber selbst zwei kontinente weiter noch singen hören bleib bleib bleib
Blixa Bargeld [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oEPJ3It_lTQ] [stay stay stay stay bars are missing, missing bars the gaps between are big enough your rapid heart when I hold you I caught you in a bad way stay stay stay I cannot stop you flying but even two continents away can still hear you singing stay stay stay stay]
"Se há pessoas que olham para o que construí como difícil de entender é porque não compreendem a complexidade da vida, e isso não é culpa minha, é defeito delas. (...) O medo de saber apavora-nos. A ideia de tomar consciência arrepia-nos. Recusamos a possibilidade de viver no interior de nós mesmos. O facto de um livro contar uma história apazigua o nosso lado infantil. Não serve de nada salvo para nos tranquilizar. E continuamos por fora do que nos inquieta, nos assusta, nos alerta (...) Fiz livros para adultos de pé e olhos abertos. (...)Não é possível falar racionalmente do que não é racional, explicar o que se passa antes das palavras, desarticular o que é feito de uma peça apenas e a vida do autor só para ele mesmo e, na melhor das hipóteses, para mais meia dúzia de criaturas, poderá ter interesse. A arte, mistério impenetrável, não cabe na razão lógica e qualquer tentativa de a desmontar será sempre inútil. (...) Permanecerá para sempre secreta e insolúvel. Pode bordar-se em torno mas fora da muralha, nada tem que ver com a inteligência, a razão, o raciocínio dedutivo: existe em si mesma, por si mesma e para si mesma, apenas permeável ao inconsciente e, no entanto, ao tocar-nos no inconsciente muda a nossa percepção do mundo e de nós mesmos em consequência de um mecanismo que nos escapa. (...)
Pelo teu amor dói-me o ar
o coração e o chapéu.
Isto, aparentemente, não significa nada e, no entanto, faz-nos vibrar como cordas."
"He offers A handshake Crooked Five fingers They form a pattern Yet to be matched (...) This time I'm gonna keep me all to myself 'She loves him, she loves him' And he makes me want to hand myself over" Björk [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KqF8_UcUQdQ]
"What is normally called religion what I would tend to call music (...) I think records and music are more appropriate and more respectful of the human soul than the churches are. And more respectful of the needs of humans to communicate with the aspects of themselves that are neglected by language. I don't think people think about God so much as they think about themselves and how they're going to get through life."
"Listen to me, don’t walk that street There’s always an end to it
(...) We all do what we can So we can do just one more thing We won’t have a thing So we’ve got nothing to lose
We can all be free
Maybe not with words
Maybe not with a look
But with your mind
I always knew what I was doing I knew every face in the cast Now who the hell let you in? I thought I buried you way back, back in my past I have waited so long That whoever loved you is gone So things will be different From now on Things will be different From now on Things will be different From now on
É tempo de parar quando: já não te preservas; ignoras o instinto natural de sobrevivência e te transformas numa suicida em potência; não evitas as lâminas que te rasgam a pele e as entranhas; és inconsequente no acto de acreditar; te permites uma existência enquanto desperdício vagamente humano.
Ultrapassaste os limites do razoável. Lembra-te disso sob pena de não conseguires regressar.
Drink up, baby, stay up all night The things you could do, you won't but you might The potential you'll be, that you'll never see The promises you'll only make Drink up with me now and forget all about the pressure of days Do what I say and I'll make you okay and drive them away The images stuck in your head People you've been before that you don't want around anymore That push and shove and won't bend to your will I'll keep them still Drink up, baby, look at the stars I'll kiss you again between the bars where I'm seeing you There with your hands in the air, waiting to finally be caught People you've been before that you don't want around anymore That push and shove and won't bend to your will I'll keep them still Drink up one more time and I'll make you mine Keep you apart deep in my heart separate from the rest Where I like you the best and keep the things you forgot The people you've been before that you don't want around anymore That push and shove and won't bend to your will I'll keep them still, I'll keep them still, I'll keep them still…
Oh, can't anybody see, We've got a war to fight, Never found our way, Regardless of what they say. How can it feel, this wrong, From this moment, How can it feel, this wrong. Storm, In the morning light, I feel, No more can I say, Frozen to myself. Beth Gibbons
He venido al desierto pa irme de tu amor, ¡Que el desierto es más tierno y la espina besa mejor! He venido a este centro de la nada pa gritar, Que tú nunca mereciste lo que tanto quise dar... ¡Que tú nunca mereciste lo que tanto quise dar! He venido al desierto pa irme de tu amor, ¡Que el desierto es más tierno y la espina besa mejor! He venido a este centro de la nada pa gritar, Que tú nunca mereciste... He venido yo corriendo, olvidándome de ti, ¡Dame un beso pajarillo no te asustes colibrí! He venido encendida al desierto pa quemar, Porque el alma prende fuego cuando deja de amar... Porque el alma prende fuego cuando deja de amar. He venido yo corriendo olvidándome de ti, ¡Dame un beso pajarillo, y no te asustes colibrí! He venido encendida al desierto pa quemar, Porque el alma prende fuego... He venido yo corriendo olvidándome de ti, ¡Dame un beso pajarillo, y no te asustes colibrí! He venido encendida al desierto pa quemar, Porque el alma prende fuego cuando deja de amar... Porque el alma prende fuego cuando deja de amar... He venido al desierto pa irme de tu amor, ¡Que el desierto es más tierno y la espina besa mejor! He venido a este centro de la nada pa gritar, ¡Que tú nunca mereciste lo que tanto quise dar! He venido yo corriendo olvidándome de ti, ¡Dame un beso pajarillo, y no te asustes colibrí! He venido encendida al desierto pa quemar, Porque el alma prende fuego
Soon this space will be too small And I’ll go outside To the huge hillside Where the wild winds blow And the cold stars shine I’ll put my foot On the living road And be carried from here To the heart of the world I’ll be strong as a ship And wise as a whale And I’ll say the three words That will save us all And I’ll say the three words That will save us all Soon this space will be too small And I’ll laugh so hard That the walls cave in Then I’ll die three times And be born again In a little box With a golden key And a flying fish Will set me free Soon this space will be too small All my veins and bones Will be burned to dust You can throw me into A black iron pot And my dust will tell What my flesh would not Soon this space will be too small And I’ll go outside And I’ll go outside And I’ll go outside Lhasa de Sela
"Following your heart is easy. Following your brain is tough. Especially after years of following that much smaller organ. That's why all parents screw up all children. (...) Your parents made you screwed up by not screwing you up."
"You know how, like in cartoons, when the building gets hit by the wrecking ball, right before the building falls down, there's always like this moment where it's perfectly still right before it collapses? We're in that moment. The wrecking ball has already hit all of this, and this is just the moment before it all falls down."
abro os olhos e estendo a mão e o corpo para fora do sono,
ergo-me por dentro do imenso vazio.
tudo se despedaçou. o sonho, e o amor que é sempre tão breve
(…) estou gasto. dei-me sempre mais do que podia. não há nada que me possam
roubar, sou um homem espoliado de todos os bens, de todas as doenças, de todas
as emoções. (…)
sou um alfabeto e não sei se terei tempo para me decifrar.